Paying Ransom....

Buying a kid, paying ransom, saving a child.... these are all terms that you will see in my posts.

It has been my experience that people who have adopted A-typical children can get a little sensitive about my particular terminology regarding adoption. I am a foster/adoption advocate. My children do and will know that they are adopted, no matter what age they come to us.

Perhaps these individuals take offense to the idea that they "bought" their kids - because as EVERY adoptive parent knows, that child is yours through & through, without a doubt. The connection you feel & the way your heart responds to them one of pure magic. I have both biological & adopted children, I know this is true! I personally do not feel that being truthful about the process that we go through to gain custody of our children AT ALL DISCOUNTS their value in our lives. It is simply the reality of the situation.

Why the heck would I call adoption, "paying ransom"? For the outsider looking in it may seem as if I'm being dramatic. Let me say this right now... in no way, shape, or form is the process of adoption anything LESS than paying a ransom for a prisoner of war.

You are "saving a child" when you have to pay a single penny to adopt one of the thousands of children that are sitting in foster care for YEARS on end (rendering them un-adoptable to non-skilled families) simply because the state will not act quickly/harshly against the bio-parents for the abuses to their children.

You are "buying a child" when an unwanted child is offered up to the "highest bidder" in a private adoption. When bio-mom requires money for "food, rent, living expenses" during her pregnancy to guarantee a "healthy" baby and also needs a post-partum compensation package.

You are paying "ransom" when a child has literally been left to die in a crib for YEARS on end and it cost THOUSANDS of dollars to make them yours. They are only fed two times a day, diaper changed once a day. When they never receive baths or see the light of day, not even touching the subject of proper medical attention, therapy or even simply affection!

Please hop over to my friend Priscilla's BLOG. I want you to meet Ryan - perhaps he can shed some light on why I feel so strongly about calling things like I see them!